Attachment Theory

I think Bowlby was on to something with his attachment theory. Consider me an infant and Tronts my 'primary caregiver'. Let's leave this thought to marinate for a little while and come back to it later.

So I went to Montréal last week. It's a beautiful city. I haven't been to Europe so I can't comment on how the architecture or the culture or the cobblestone paths compare. All I can say is how it made me feel and it did feel like how I would imagine Europe would feel. That's vague and whimsical I know, but walking the streets and being swept up in the Parisian-like atmosphere and the bilingualism, made me think I'd left Canadian shores. Well, right up until the point where I started to converse with people in English and suddenly they weren't speaking French any more - they were speaking English with a Canadian accent. It's hard to explain the unique interwinding of old and new that the city seems to balance so well. There's something terribly romantic about it all.

Some of the highlights of Monts included:

• the view from the top of the mountain which gave the city its name, Mount Royal (or Le Mont Royal to the Frenchies);
• the light and sound show at the Notre-Dame Basilica and its thoroughly entertaining (albeit saccharine) depiction of the history of Montréal and the church - let's just say that watching people mouth French words on a screen and listening to an English version through headphones makes for some hilariously funny viewing and;
• the most frightening bathroom trip I think I will ever endure at the 'Le Club Sandwich' restaurant (picture walking into a very dimly lit, creepily silent, enormous, yet empty bathroom).

On our last night, Alex and I went to a lezzie bar in the Gay Village called 'Le Drugstore'. Lame name, but it was a pretty cool little hang out. There were at least two other girls there wearing flannel. It is reassuring to know that girl lovers all around the world share a similar fashion sense, even the French-Canadians. There were two big television screens in front of us broadcasting a live NHL game. It just so happens that that night, the Montréal Canadiens were playing the Toronto Maple Leafs. The Leafs won by one goal in the end. I couldn't help but feel a little twinge of pride.

As I was boarding the bus to travel back to Tronts I felt a sense of relief and calmness come over me; the same feeling you get if you've been travelling for a while and you're returning home. I was only away for three days but I missed Tronts.

In attachment theory it is my understanding that infants become attached to primary caregiver adults who interact with them for any extended period during their early years. When a child starts to experience and interact with the world around them, they look to these caregivers for support, and they act as a secure base to explore from and come back to. Once removed from a caregiver, separation anxiety may occur.

I'm no psychologist, so maybe I'm just bending theories to suit. Or perhaps my ramblings have some backbone and I've got a mummy named Brisbane and a daddy called Tronts.